Update of the Century!

Wow. It's been six months since I last blogged! I'm embarrassed. From someone who used to blog almost twice a month! Just goes to show you what two kids has done to me. Obviously a lot has changed the last six months. I even started this post like two months ago and have had to add a lot on! So get comfy it's long.

I'll start with Hudson who turned TWO in January! And if there's one thing I like to keep updated is his cleft progress. We are currently in the middle of getting speech therapy started! Hudson and his lack of proper talking has been very challenging for Curtis and I. This may be one of the hardest parts of his cleft journey for me or just this toddler business for that matter. It's caused a lot of tantrums and much frustration. Since I've been a nursery leader at church it's hard not to envy these moms who's two year olds and even 18 month olds who can clearly say words and sentences properly. He has improved a ton in the last 4 months though and we do know some words and sentences he uses. Lately he has been very good at repeating what we say. Like the other day we were pulling into Target and how can you not shout "Yay! Target!" when parking?! So he starts to say "tah-geh!" It was cute. And today he was saying towel "ow-el". And he says "Oh-wa" for Nova. I love when he's yelling for her.

He was evaluated for speech therapy two weeks ago which he will be starting in a couple more weeks. I really love the speech pathologist who is on his cleft team. The problem with this is that she is in Phoenix. And he will need therapy once a week. Such a drag! But she works specifically with cleft kids and is really great with Hudson. I don't want to have to worry about finding someone else we like if it means we don't have to drive an hour away. So I'll deal with it. I've been looking for fun things to do around Phoenix to make the trip extra worth it and fun for the kids. So far lots of splash pads!

So the speech pathologist, Dr. Leech, went on about how smart Hudson is and how well behaved he was there! But we already knew that... I told him she hasn't seen him at home. She said he should pick up therapy pretty quickly and if he happens not to improve much then it could be a palate issue which means that would need to be corrected with in a year. She said sometimes their palate is just not long enough to make the right sounds. She told me a lot of his sounds come from the back of his throat and that he doesn't use his palate much to talk. So she hopes to correct any bad habits before it's too late! Fingers crossed!

On a happier note he had his two year check up with his surgeon, Dr. Beals, and he was impressed with how everything is looking still. I told him about the hole we thought was in the roof of his mouth but he didn't seem too concerned, nor did he even see it! But I still think it may be there. They took more pictures of Hudson to use to show other parents because well his repair is just that awesome!!! Everyone who saw him that day was SO impressed with his lip repair. They always are. They mention how if they didn't know him there was no way anyone could tell he had a cleft lip. The color is perfect. Makes me so proud and happy. But also kind of sad that no trace of the face I first fell in love with is left behind. To anyone else of course. I can see his perfectly imperfect lips and smile and nose.

On to Nova who became a bit more interesting at her 6 month check up. Her pediatrician has always taken a long time to feel the soft spot on her head I've noticed at every appointment. I always take a feel for myself later and have tried to feel a soft spot that is not there. Well at her six month check up she finally mentioned it. She called it trigonocephaly. And showed me some pictures (bad idea) of other baby's heads that come to a point at the forehead. Although kept saying if that is what she has it is a mild case but it will need fixed ASAP. So she referred us to a neurosurgeon. Awesome right? Because a cleft isn't enough to deal with now my princess may need surgery on her skull! Not cool woman! So of course I researched once I got home but told my self not to worry until we met with the surgeon. Which was in January. It was a quick appointment where he just felt her head and mentioned sutures and premature closure and stuff like that... Apparently it was concerning enough to send her off to get a CT scan.

Two weeks later we went to Cardon's early one morning to have the CT done. And memories of Hudson's palate repair came back to me. Horrible times... Thankfully the wait was longer than the CT itself. It was just Nova, the nurse, and I in the x-ray room and she strapped, wrapped and strapped some more Nova up real tight on the table and I had to hold her little jaw so her head wouldn't move side to side. The machine was big and scary looking and the sound it made was creepy. It was only about 30 second long though thankfully. Nova did great and held still but towards the end her eyes got big and she started to squirm and I could tell she was getting scared. It was so sad!

We met with her surgeon a few hours later to go over the scans and this is what we found out:

It's called craniosynostosis. Premature closures of the sutures on the skull. If you didn't know, when babies are born they have a few different plates of their skull that are not fused together so the plates overlap when the baby is being born. (Arn't we just so thoughtfully made!?) Well one of her sutures, her metopic suture, fused shortly after she was born when normally that specific suture should close around nine months. This can cause the skull to become pointed in the font or the forehead, since babies skulls are also real flexible in their first 6 months. As the brain grows the skull expands and since the skull is not fussed it has room to grow... unless one or more of those sutures is closed already. It can cause too much pressure and other problems like eye sight and learning delays in the future. In Nova's case her metopic one has fussed and although her head has become very narrow in the front it is not sever enough to be considered trionocephaly and will NOT require surgery! Thank heavens!! We had a follow up with the surgeon two months later and he took one look (and feel) of her head and said he will not need to see her again!

But I also mentioned this to Hudson's surgeon, Dr. Beals, who also works with craniosynostosis patients. He looked at her and also agreed it is mild. They took pictures of her head at Hudson's appointment and he wants to see when she turns one to compare.

And that's that in a nutshell. Anti-climatic. And so we joke that she saw that Hudson was born with a cleft so she decided to close everything up early to prevent any clefts from happening. (I can)

And if that wasn't enough for us to deal with she has just been a PILL since the day she turned 5 months. She started waking up in the night every 2-3 hours and would not sleep unless she nurses. Even still she will wake up about 2 times in the night. It's rough. She hibernated the first 5 months of her life and now she's done sleeping I guess! Also around 3-4 months she started getting real bad diaper rashes. She constantly has one going on! And if she does have some clear buns it's only for a day or two. We also found out she has eczema! But it's kept under control when I keep her skin moisturized. It was a lot worse over the winter. And on top of all this we ALSO found out she is allergic to dairy! Come on girl! She kept getting a red (wait, what other color would it be?) rash all around her mouth occasionally and I noticed it once after she was drinking from Hudson's sippy cup of milk. I gave her another dairy product the next day and sure enough...a rash.

I'm thinking her diaper rashes and eczema is probably from me eating dairy too. But I seriously have no self control when it comes to what I eat! It's bad! If I can't change my diet for the sake of my own daughter then there is just no hope for any change in my diet ever! EVER!

On that note we are still breast feeding! Going strong! Well she is... I think I would have quit a months ago when I ended up with thrush which is the worst thing ever, EVER! And so far has been the worst part of nursing! BUT the little girl will take no bottle and no sippy! So I had no choice but to suffer through it. Once it was taken care of (after a freakin' month) I was able to enjoy nursing again. UNTIL I got it again for only a week this time. But I knew what it was right away so it didn't last nearly as long as the first time or as painful. Someone shoot me. My goal is to make it to a year and then I'd like to start weaning her soon after. Hopefully. I've just sacrificed so much to continue to breast feed! It really has not been more convenient for me than a bottle. More trouble than anything else. And I've asked myself many times if it really IS worth it sometimes. But I keep going for Nova, and not because breast milk is good for her but because she loves to nurse. And I'll admit I have some emotional attachment to it too. Although I'll be more than relieved when it's over I also think it will be hard for me when it ends. It's a love/hate relationship really. I'm pretty sure I could write a book on breast feeding now. I've seen it all.

Not to linger on all the negatives... she has also be SO enjoyable lately! She is a crazy ball of fire! She climbs on everything! She loves to bug Hudson and she's good at it. Always getting into is projects. She just yells right back at him when he gets mad. It's cute. She loves to jump! She claps. She dances. She's taking a few steps! She finally got a tooth at 10 months! A top one! Just like Hudson did! She now has just her four top teeth at 11 months. Funny kids. She loves to eat everything now! She loves to talk and is so loud! She is just so goofy and such a mama's girl!


And here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Christmas Day 2013

Poor Curtis was sick with pneumonia and we didn't know it then. It's wasn't really an enjoyable Christmas for me and definitely for Curtis!

They sure loves each other!

They got the wagon for Christmas.

They love playing outside together! I just made them a splash pad out of PVC pipes that I know we'll have good times with this summer!!

Gilbert Temple open house!

Beautiful right? And I'm not talking about the sunset and Temple.

Hudson's 2nd birthday! 1.16.14

It was a present to me to see him blowing out his candle seeing that a year ago just blowing was impossible for him! 

Bowling for the Birthday Boy!

It's my party and I can cry if I want to!!

He rocks at opening presents! He was so interested in them unlike other two year olds I've seen!

Valentine Pictures

Easter Sunday 2014

 I love these kiddos!!

"Oh wow!" he always says.

That mom

I'm turning into that mom! The one I thought was a little odd for just... parenting different. I've come a long way in my parenting journey since Hudson was born. Although those were the easy days when he was new. I just went with the flow and did what people told me to do. Life was good. And then when he was about 8 months old and I found out I was pregnant with little miss Novabuns I learned about this whole other world of parenting! And I thought those moms were weird. I wont lie. They didn't vaccinate or circumcise. They slept with their babies and breast fed until 3. They "wore" they babies everywhere. They used all natural remedies and they used cloth diapers. They had their babies at home in the tub. These are the "crunchy" moms I learned and none of this I was familiar with. I was on the other end of the spectrum. I cheered for doctors! After all Hudson has needed medical attention since he was born! These moms did things their own way and I didn't like it because I felt like I had to defend my own parenting ways.

After getting myself into a few "heated" discussion on these deferent topics and realizing after each one that it doesn't matter what other parents do. They obviously love their children enough to be advocating for their natural parenting ways. And what's so wrong about natural? I also realized how little I knew. Since then I have done research for myself. I became a little more knowledgeable about vaccines and natural remedies. I learned more about breast feeding and how awesome breast milk is for our babies. I've learn baby wearing is a "thing" now but that it also makes having two kids a lot more easier!

I've learned a lot since having Hudson. And I don't  regret the way I've raised him. That's not the point. The point is that just maybe I'm learning to be my own kind of mom. It's OK that I leaned on my mom for support and advice on raising Hudson but as he grew and as I grew as a mother I'm finding what works best for our family and just doing simply what I want. And maybe that means becoming a little of "that mom". And that's OK. 

I still praise doctors for their knowledge, time and effort they put into their career. I still believe in vaccinating and we think it's best for our kids. We choose to circumcise our boys. My babies sleep in their own beds in their own room. And I'm all for epidurals and so thankful for formula!

Take the time to be your own kind of mom. Do what you want to do. Even if that means trying something new or standing out as being a little odd. :)

That being said Novabuns is a five month old now! Whaat!? Look at those cute little piggy tails! I seriously, seriously can not believe how fast it has gone by. I swear she was just in size 1 diapers yesterday... oh wait, that was yesterday. And speaking of diapers, yes, I made the switch permanently, she's a cloth diaper babe now! I did tons of research right before she was born and bought a stash when she was 1 month old. I never ever thought I would go down this road! But I had many friends who cloth diaper and they reassured me how much they love it! My main reason for switching was to save money of course. We will save about $700 in a year and even more since what are the chances she is potty trained in a year?! Yeah right!

So once I got them I did a trial run on Hudson until her little buns were big enough to fit in them. But 3 diapers later Hudson ended up with a rash and I was al ready to give up! Fast forward 2 months when I thought Nova would finally fit in them and all I got were leaks and a battle of yeast! So I gave up. But I held on to them because I still really wanted it to work out. SO, two weeks ago I tried them on her again. No rash and no leaks for a week and they actually fit! So I switched!

It requires a little more work of course and an extra load of laundry. What I thought I wouldn't be able to handle was the poop but it's really a piece of cake! Instead of throwing the diapers in the trash I just throw them in the wash. It's easier than I expected really. And she has some stinkin' cute diaper colors now! As if picking her outfit out wasn't hard enough...

So I made Hudson's and Nova's Halloween costumes! They turned out so cute! It was cheap and easy! Man, you can do anything with felt!! I love my superheroes! 

We spent our 3rd anniversary at Fountain Hills. 

Hudson has been the best brother ever to little sis Nova! He seriously could not be any more sweeter with her. I heard horror stories of older siblings being mean and rough with new siblings so I was a little concerned. But never once has he done anything to hurt her or be mean in any way. He gives her loves pats, brings me her blankets, and puts her pacifier in her mouth. He shares his toys with her and gives her goodnight kisses. He is the sweetest guy ever! We are so blessed! I can't wait until they can play together!

Nova is still my great little night sleeper! Hudson did not sleep through the night until 7 months I think. After our cry it out test. Occasionally she wakes in the night only to go back to sleep with her paci. She'll get up about 7:30 and then take a good morning nap until 11. After that it's iffy when she'll nap next. And I could act surprised when I tell you that she has started to scoot but I'm not. Since I could feel her move in my belly she was non stop. So I'm not surprised she's already on the move and determined! Looking like me is not all she gets from me...

Enjoying the journey

Isn't modern medicine just amazing?! Miracles happen thanks to such talented hands.

 "And to others it is given to have faith to heal." D&C 46:20 

I believe that healing others is the gift doctors were given. And I'm so grateful to Hudson's surgeon for not hiding his gift.

I have had hundreds of comments made to me about how amazing Hudson lip looks and I can't help but agree with every person who mentions it. It really is an amazing repair. I always returned with a thank you but really I wish Dr. Beals could be there to hear every comment made about Hudson.

We are so blessed people! To live in this amazing country with such advanced technology right around the corner from us. We didn't have to wait years and years for someone to come along and give Hudson the surgeries he needed. He was taken care of the instant he was born. And he'll continue to be looked after well into his teens.

That face. It just makes me smile. I hope I can teach him to appreciate all he has been through. And to look at his baby pictures and see a miracle in progress. I want him to be confident in the way he looks and be proud of the fact that he was born with a cleft. It's nothing to keep a secret. It's who he was and is and because of the strength he has shown this far I know he wont stop here.

October 5th was six months since his palate repair. Is it weird that I miss his cleft palate too? Well I do. What a day that was. Seriously that was the hardest day of my life so far. That's not what I imagined when we knew Hudson had to have surgeries. Everyone would tell me that it would be an "easy fix" and "not a big deal" compared to what other possibilities there were. Well that was OUR little boy on the operating table, it wasn't an easy fix and it IS a big deal.

So now he has a perfect little palate scar to join his perfect little lip scar. Always there to remind us that there will be hard times we have to go through in life but that by pushing through we can make it out with a smile on our face. If there is one thing I can't stress enough is to enjoy YOUR journey, what ever it may be.

A girl named Nova

I'm a slacker! Seriously. I blogged every time Hudson turned another month older until he was one year old! Plus some! I'm three months behind on Nova. But let's be honest, Hudson was a cleft more interesting to read about than Miss Nova! I really have nothing to post about her unless if you want to hear how she sleeps 10 hours straight a night and poops 5 times a day? That's what I thought.

But really, she's great! Gosh, is there really anyway you can describe your love for your children?? I just look at them and want to hug them to death they are so darn cute!! I can't stand it! Nova's laughs make my heart want to burst and Hudson's squeals of excitement as we chase him around the island... They are more than perfect.

Ok well if you really do want to know more about Nova here you go...

She is now 11 pounds 2 ounces and 23 1/2 inches long! She's been rolling over both ways for a few weeks now. She LOVES to be on her tummy! Which is so weird to me because Hudson hated it! But I know it's because she has slept on her tummy since we brought her home. I'm hooked. Tummy sleeping is the way to go! No more flat heads in my house! The girl is still a great sleeper! But we've all known that since day one! Her bedtime is between 9 and 10 and she'll sleep until about 7 and go back to sleep for another 2-4 hours. Which has been nice cause when she goes to sleep then Hudson gets up so I can feed him and spend time with him. And then he goes down for a nap and she wakes up. I actually like it that way. Everyone says to put them on the same schedule so they nap at the same time, but it's easier for me to take care of one at a time!

She smiles, talks, laughs, and plays so much more now. I love watching her! She'll play on the floor for quite a while by herself. She also likes the walker and her swing. Gosh I can't believe she is 4 months old already!! I feel like it took forever for Hudson to turn 4 months old! Maybe it was just the anticipation of his surgery. And I can't even imagine Nova having surgery at this age! Hudson was just so old and ready for it! He was so much bigger to me! And technically he was. He has been over a pound bigger than her at the same age. My petite little girl!!

At 4 months old I already had Hudson eating baby food and cereal. Nova just doesn't seem ready to me. I was planning on waiting anyway. It's kind of a pain in the beginning so why do it sooner than I have to? Plus... I don't like messes. I can't believe how much I have learned with Hudson that makes having Nova so much easier! It's awesome! I know what I'm doing with her, but Hudson... He's another story. All his mile stones are still knew to me. The tantrums? Hilarious, but frustrating when I'm trying to get him to eat! And potty training is just around the corner! Sometimes I get excited about it and then other times I think it would be easier to just stick with diapers. I'm lazy.

And everyone and their dog who told me it would take about three months to get nursing down well, you were right. I feel so confident now! We are gonna make it! And speaking of lazy... I love not getting bottles ready and packing formula. I LOVE not having to wash bottles!! I seriously loathed that chore for some reason. We just grab the diaper bag and go! I just love it! She'll look up at me and smile and then go back to eating. It really is quite a bonding and special thing. It's been really hard work to make it this far and I'm very proud of myself for not giving up. It's kind of cool to think that even outside of my belly I'M the one still making her grow! And I never would have understood any of this if I wasn't breast feeding.

I've really enjoyed having a girl! Even though she hardly ever gets bows in her hair! Keyword: hair. She has some (OK a lot) so maybe I don't feel as obligated. Plus I think they are really annoying! Bur for some reason I keep buy them. They are so dang cute!! She does have her earrings and bracelet that is always on though! There is just something about having a little you that is so special and makes you want to be all matchy, matchy. It's fun. I love her.

She's going to be a ball of fire I know it! She's very dramatic already. No patience. Wait, that reminds me of someone... She'll be the one to toughen Hudson up! My sweet, caring little boy.

Oh what fun it is to have one of each!! Having two has still been pretty easy! Their age gap of 16 months has been perfect!!! To all those who said otherwise. Ahem. Seriously, why do people have to be such downers? I got tired of seeing peoples eyes grow wide when I told them how far apart they would be. And all the "Your gonna have your hands full!" comments. Ya well I'll have my hands full with 2 no matter what. Then there was this one day at church when I was already well over half way pregnant and I actually got my first "Your going to love it!" comment. I seriously wanted to cry!! She made me feel so much better!! So don't be so doom and gloom with your comments to parents. You may not agree with their situation but they do and negative comments are nothing but unhelpful!

Life is beautiful and so is this girl!!!

San Diego Temple 

That face.

Our Hud the Stud turned 18 months old yesterday!! That just seem so old to me! He's turning out to be quite the goof ball/ nerd/ weirdo. Ok so maybe we already knew all that... since day one pretty much. But it sure has been magnified as of late! Making us laugh is one of his specialties. He's quite the character.

He is about 20.8 pounds now and that is just me putting him on our scale. He's got 10 teeth now. Still missing his two  top and bottom left laterals. It's weird that those ones have still not come in. It makes me wonder if those teeth will be missing since his cleft was on his left side. I'm excited for him to get an x-ray. Whenever that will be... He does have another dentist appointment in September. I don't think they will do anything then though.

We were very disappointed to discover a fistula in palate a few weeks ago. That is a tiny pin hole on the roof of his mouth, towards the front, like behind his top teeth. It either never closed after palate repair or reopened sometime after. You can totally tell he has a whole when he sucks from his sippy. He's very noisy and it's probably equivalent to us sucking through a straw with a hole in it. I have still not called his surgeon about it. There is a chance the fistula will close on it's own or it will need repaired later on. I obviously don't know any details until I can talk with his surgeon. I'm real sad about it though. Just one more thing that will need fixed. His next surgery, if needed, wont be until he goes to kindergarten. So we still have time. I just worry about it affecting his speech and eating.

Speaking of speech he still only says "mama" and "uh-oh". He's been saying some other things that we don't understand. And some words like "thank you" he just says the sounds with out pronouncing any letters. I'm still not quite worried about his speech yet. But it does make it very frustrating for both of us when he is trying to tell us what he wants. Usually he just takes us by the hand and drags us to what he wants or where he wants to go. And then does this whinny "uh uh" as he points. Funny guy.

He has come to LOVE Curious George! When he wants it on he'll come up to us "ooo ooo". He probably watches too much during the day... When one episode ends he immediately yells for another to be one. Even if he is in the other room not watching it he hears the ending music and runs in the room for another one to be one.

He's still a great sleeper! And still loves to collect things in twos. He gets quite obsessive about it too. As of late we have had to leave the wooden spoons out for him or else he throws a fit. Wooden spoons, spoons, pens, chapsticks, plastic sand shovels, blocks, and cords are just a few of his favorites. He still loves his ball pit, even though he got attacked by a scorpion in it! And he loves to play in the water!

He has already mastered being a big brother to Nova! While in the car today Nova had a blanket over her carseat and Hudson lifted it up and peaked in and "awwed" at her. It was quite precious. He also gives great hugs lately and if you ask for a kiss he'll give you one. He also gives high fives and knuckles. He sure is a lot of fun lately!

Next stop... a 2 year old!

Life with a princess...

Miz Nova Renae is 6 weeks old as of today! Yet it feels she has been with us a life time. She just fits in so perfectly in the Hofmann home. I am so in love with her!!! I love having a girly! She has continued to be the most perfect little thang! And I just don't get it! Besides all Hudson has been through he really has just been an easy going guy so I thought for sure, for sure, this girl would give us some trouble. Think again. The only way she could possibly be any easier was if she didn't poop but that ain't happening! I keep telling myself she must be my prize after billions of appointments, NAMs, and surgeries we went through with Hudson. She's a keeper!

Twice she has slept 11 hours straight. I didn't think that was possible for a newborn! And she continues to sleep 6-9 hours at night! What the!? Somehow she was born with a sleep schedule already. I'll try not to act so surprised when all hell breaks loose and the trouble begins with her. I keep waiting for it to happen but she keeps being so amazing! I thought for sure with all the bragging I've done karma would get to me. Not yet.

I've been sleeping her on her tummy since she came home from the hospital. And maybe that's why she sleeps so great. I've been afraid to test that theory though. Plus I have to keep that little head perfect for all that beautiful dark hair! I'm in love with her head! We don't want any more flat heads... ahem, Hudson. Ooops.

And nursing... whoa, is that another story! I knew it would be hard, but not this hard! I'm proud of myself for making it to 6 weeks! I'm one to take the easy way out of things if at all possible and those first couple of weeks a quick bottle was so tempting at times when I would end up in tears of frustration. I really don't know what has kept me going! The easier it has gotten the more I have enjoyed it though. AND learned that breast feeding really is easier than a bottle! I think she will be the one to teach me patience. Plus I'm a Nova hog and like the fact that I'm the only one who gets to feed her which makes me that much more her favorite. For now at least. It really is something special to be able to nurse her.

So the little lady now weighs 7 pounds 15 ounces as of yesterday! I either just have little babies or I'm starving them... I love that they get to stay little longer. I get my moneys worth out of their newborn clothes that's for sure!

Hudson has just been awesome with her. I really couldn't ask for a better 18 month old big brother! Most the time he doesn't even notice her but when he does he's giving her her paci, touching her toes, rubbing her head, and sharing his blanket with her. Still wont hold her yet though. But he is so sweet to her! Since he's been awesome and she's been awesome having two kids has really been a breeze so far. It has it's challenges for sure but it's been easy to handle. And maybe that's because Curtis gets home from school at 1 and helps out a lot with Hudson. Life is good.

There is just something extra special about little girls. Her spirit is so sweet, so fragile and pure, the way I wish she could stay the rest of her life. I think it takes some extra care in raising a Daughter of God. On Sunday Curtis gave her a name and blessing and I started to tear up before he even started. It was such a perfect day! We love being surrounded by everyone we love!

She really is just so perfect! She is asleep on my chest as I type.

Father's Day