Friday, November 16, 2012

Double D!

Hudson made it to the double digits! (Not that I didn't think he would...) He is 10 months old today!! And what a 10 months it has been! Holy crap he'll be one in 2 months!! He is definitely not old enough to be one... He's still my baby... My growing baby.

Slowly but surly he is growing. At his 9 month check up he weighed 15.13 lbs. So He's probably made it to 16 lbs by now. Still in the 0 percentile though... Hudson's 10th month brought many new changes! Let's see if I can name them all...

-At his 9 month check up we found out he had his FIRST ear infection. Which we didn't even know about. That's how awesome he is. And despite the fact that cleft babies are prone to them, he managed to last 9 months with out one!
-He's also been sick for the FIRST time. Not terribly sick, but along with his ear infection he's had a major runny nose and has been coughing since. But I'll have you know it's hardly phased him. We have been so lucky to have such a healthy baby!
-The probable cause of these... setbacks, have been 2 pearly white front teeth that have popped through! He's finally got teeth!! His top 2! How odd is he? I was so happy to see that he actually had is upper left one! That's where the notch in his gums is. I can tell it'll be crooked. Bu I know he's got a long way to go before he has perfectly straight teeth!
-He has started to stand all on his own!
-Along with standing he has been taking a few steps!! It's usually when I hold my arms out for him, but sometimes he thinks he can already walk and just take off somewhere. He gets SO excited when he's taking his steps that I can't even put him back by the couch to let him walk again because he starts taking off again! He is getting braver and braver! I can just imagine him running all over the place when he can actually walk. Chasing the dogs...
-He can say "Uh-Oh". It's so cute!! I've been saying it to him for a long time now whenever something drops and he would usually just get one end or the other. But he pulled it together about a week ago.
-He learned out to clap! And boy do I love seeing him clap! It's the cutest thing when he gets those little arms going!
-He can give high fives
-And he can wave good-bye
-He is still obsessed with tags and strings
-Lately he has done a lot of "collecting" He likes to gather a bunch of things in one hand and crawl around with them. If he drops one thing he'll stop and gather everything back up in one hand. It's quite entertaining. And he goes on forever doing this. It's usually with my phone and the remote.
-I have to say how impressed I am with how and what he eats. My mom was feeding him pieces of Teddy Grahams a few weeks ago and I'll admit that I almost didn't want her too in fear he would choke on the hard piece. But he crunched away on them like no big deal! Since then I let him eat anything and everything! I never though I would be able to do that with his cleft palate. But if you know Hudson then you know he is one determined little boy! His cleft doesn't hold him back from anything! It only proves that our own weaknesses or setbacks or whatever is in our way we CAN overcome it! He amazed me once more.
-Along with his determination he has learned how to go out the doggy door. Which at first I though it was cute but now I end up pulling him out of it more than five times a day. And he usually isn't happy about it. Or if I'm too slow I have to go outside and dig him out of the dog bowls. Which makes him even more mad of course.

He's one funny boy! I can seriously not get enough of him. I love watching him learn. I can just see his brain working so hard to figure new things out. He is so smart! I think of how he was never newborn to me. Maybe the first 2 weeks, but after that... he has always seemed so old to me. And maybe it's because all he has been through. It made him grow up faster. Because really, no baby should have to have surgeries and mouth pieces and have to work for their food. But this is life. And this is HIS life. And it's who he is and he has made the best of it! He gives me hope that he can overcome what ever is set before him, whether it be yet another surgery or the temptations of life. But all parents have big dreams for their children don't they? Well Hudson is something extra, I can feel it.

There is a story I read because someone on a cleft group I am in mentioned it. And I have to share it...


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

By: Emily Perl Kingsley

It makes me cry every time I read it. Maybe it's because I'm pregnant... ooops thats for another post. I couldn't have said it better myself. The day I found out about Hudson's lip I felt these exact feelings. I had my time to mourn over the fact that this is not what we signed up for. But I chose to move forward from those feelings. And look at where that has brought us! We chose to enjoy our journey rather than live with regrets. We are enjoying our Holland. We love who Hudson is and all that he has brought into our life, even if it means a few extra hospital bills and a long bumpy road ahead of us and not to mention a few extra friends that we would have never met. It's never changed how we felt about Hudson. I'm proud to be his mom! 




Cleft Buddies


Have a good day!